“Hardships often prepare ordinary people for an extraordinary destiny” – C.S. Lewis
Episode 6 – Open Up Your Heart and Let the Sunshine In
The moment that sent me into the abyss of darkness will always be with me. I will never forget the loss of my twin baby girls. In fact, getting out of the darkness had its own additional trials for my wife and I when it came to having kids. On top of losing our girls, my wife was put in the unfair position where she could never bear children again. That left limited options for us. We decided to go down the path of adoption. Being willing to go down this path was not an easy one for me generally or emotionally. I recognize the selfishness in those feelings and emotions, but to deny I had them would be insincere to my listeners and this process. I took it personally, I made it an obstacle in my marriage, I avoided the topic for too long, and ultimately, it led to a lot of sedation.
The funny thing about sedating to avoid pain is you also sedate the good things, the awesome things, and things that make life incredible. You also associate with people who prefer sedation, and hurt people who are actually there for you. And in that, there are some tough lessons to have to face up to, there are some hard realities for which I owe a lot of people an apology.
When I finally let the pain in, I wasn’t only filled with the loss of Charlotte and Sophia, but more importantly, I was also filled with their love. While I will never forget the tragedy, I will also never stop feeling the joy and love they brought into my heart. When I did that, I was able to grieve, and then take that love and actually be willing to bring that love back into my home life. I was able to go from avoiding and being angry about adoption to running full speed toward adopting a baby.
And guess what happened?!?!? Violet Grace Bourque came into my life, and now she, my wife Jenny, and myself have a great life and a bright future. And she is only the beginning!
And I can say this because she came into my life right before I lost my business and a lot of the people around me and the business. And I’ve never been happier or more fulfilled because I am able to now live a purpose driven life striving toward the light. I now get to live in the truth because everyone in my old life showed their true colors for better or worse.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s a process, and I know I have still have mountains to climb…I’m just looking forward to it rather than avoiding it. And I now have the tools and appreciation to find the light in the hardship.
I hope you enjoy the story…
Thank you for listening!